A Doll's Story

by Vagrant Gautam

A really emo poem about trauma and healing.



Drifting in the breeze, it is unmoored at sea, Light-headed, light, for the first time it's... free It was tossed around and cast aside per its owners' whims Untethered now in uncharted depths – let's see if it swims? An empty socket where an arm once was, twisted out in rage Scratches, strange marks taint its body; it's showing signs of age Its woolen hair is getting wet, its blue dress slowly darkens Its plastic body gets waterlogged as the abyss gently beckons No longer can it blow away, it's too heavy now to float Its lashes flutter up as it's pulled down, water up to its throat Submerged, terrified and alone, it can't move, it's drowning, fast! A numbness descends as it is smothered by a flood of memories past Its glassy eyes stare into the depths and schools of fish swim blithely by "Why didn't I leave?" she thinks to herself, "Why didn't I even try?" Anger roils inside her, joined by profound sadness, then fear It's a maelstrom of emotions and her vision starts to blur Tears fall as night falls and the moonlight makes the water gleam Thoughts rattle loudly in her head; she just wants to scream Currents tug at her dress, whisper comforting words to heal all: "How could you have left, or fought, or tried? You were only just a doll..." The castaway listens thoughtfully and the intensity starts to dissipate Held afloat by the kindly currents, she feels less of the weight Days, weeks, months go by, bringing the return of her customary joy She's healing herself and the strength she now has, no one can destroy She is her own person now, and her scars have a song to sing To remind her to never again be someone else's plaything.